Then there is my husband’s family. My family used to be all Mormon (converted in the mid 70’s). Well not me, I was told join the Mormon church or get out of the family (at 13). No one knew I thought the Mormon church was a crock of shit and a cult (except the Bishop of our church Bishop Peterson, who said well whatever your family thinks is right). So I went to church to shut everyone up and keep the peace. My husband’s family was raised Mormon. So, when my husband and I got together, his family thought, “oh good, he marrying a good Mormon girl and he will come back to the church”. (He never believed any of their bullshit either.) His family didn’t know I was the furthest thing from a “good Mormon girl” there could ever be.
I was an agnostic. I really didn’t care about religion, didn’t care about church, couldn’t be bothered about any of it. Until I met my husband (the big fallen Mormon) who encouraged me to use the critical thinking skills I’d honed in college to religion. To really examine what this country was founded on, to really explore what the current politicians are really up to. So now my eyes are open.
And now, his family excludes me from all emails. I am a pariah. So all the friendly banter, all the family chatter, was nothing but a ploy to get me to get my husband back involved with the church. I am now excluded from all family emails, once in awhile they comment on my posts when I post what’s going on with our lives. Alan has no Facebook presence so the only news they get about him is through me and my Facebook page.
Today, Alan sent me yet another forwarded copy of something going on in the family. I’m done. I won’t allow them to use me to get news of Alan via Facebook anymore. I have blocked the entire family. Mine and his. I’m done. We don’t believe what they believe and I won’t be used anymore.
Family doesn’t mean blood.
Family doesn’t mean blood.
My sister Pam is the only person in my family that is biologically related. All the other people I consider family are people I trust, very old dear friends and a couple of acquaintances. I learned very early on that family, specifically parents, does not equate to right, righteous or even moral. I have surrounded myself with people who have the same basic beliefs, we differ in some areas but are very tolerant of each other, debates are common but that's the true definition of family.
ReplyDeleteFor a large portion of my youth I was raised Mormon as was my sister Pam. For as long as I can remember my father physically abused me, well beyong typical "spankings". I too approached Bishop Peterson, who immediately betrayed my trust and told my father. So much for religious confidentiality. I quickly learned that family and authority were not to be trusted. That was until I started making my own "patchwork" family from friends and my sister Pam. Family is not blood, family is who you can trust.
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